48th Time's the charm!

A literary agency actually asked me to send in a manuscript today.

I am more than a little pleased right now.

Granted, the fellow who asked for it may decide, upon reading it, it's not for them... but hey! Doesn't change the fact it was asked for.

At least I know I can write a serviceable query letter.

It's something.

Certainly enough to keep me in the game for another day.

Back to the writing desk! :)

How to Get Rejected in 10 Minutes

I'm sure there's a way to talk about this without sounding all sour grapes, snarky, or [insert callous remark here], but in the course of my pimping Ghosty: This Fenceless World, I recently suffered this e-mailed defeat:



Thanks, but not for us.

[name redacted],
Author of [TITLE OF BOOK redacted] (Writer Digest Books)
[name of agency redacted]
(718) 555-5344
[blog address redacted]
visit [website address redacted]

Twitter:[account redacted]

***

Why did this one get to me?

This wasn't my first rejection, by any means, but as I read it, I realized that the agency spent more time pimping its products than rejecting my work.

Not enough we're shooting you down, but while you're reeling, how about purchasing some of our fine products? It's like I've been bumrushed out of a fancy restaurant, but I've been encouraged to buy a t-shirt on my way out. Try to avoid eye contact with anybody, though. You might infect them with your mediocrity. (Okay, I am being a little sour grapes and snarky here, but the wound is fresh.)

I honestly would have been less upset by a three-word "Not for us."

Seriously. I know I'm one of thousands of petitioners, but please don't try to sell me crap while you're shooting me down.

Speaking of which?

Time elapsed between submission and rejection? 10 minutes.

Actually, I had the AOL window up and it said it was sent 3 minutes before I opened it, but I'll be generous and go with the inbox time.

Either way, a personal record. Suck it, fellow losers!

The Return of Ghost Dogg

DWCC dropped off the radar a few months ago, but if only 5 people follow a blog, who cares? On the other hand, when you think that we manage to be pretty self-involved as a species with the billions of stars in the billions of galaxies out there, my words among the mere millions of blogs out there are a hell of a lot weightier. So suck it.

Anyway, to catch up:

Back problems popped up this spring. I was in a pretty bad car accident at 16, and I broke my back in the Army, so I guess it was only a matter of time before it settled accounts with me. I've been moving around like a 60-year old for about 6 weeks now, and it's no fun. It's not like I want to train for the Chicago Marathon or join the French Foreign Legion any time soon, but when it starts sapping my energy for writing, then the line gets crossed. I went to the VA, and anyone who knows me can infer a lot from that.

School is over for a couple of months. It's my fourth year of teaching, and I'll admit that this one, for a variety of reasons, was the hardest yet. I've come to the conclusion that I'm not a lifer, though, and with that a number of adjustments will have to be made. I wish I could go into more detail about this, but discretion forbids me. For now.

The sequel to Ghosty: This Fenceless World is at about 17K words. Its working title is Ghosty II, but hopefully a better title will come along soon. I've sent out about 15-25 queries so far, received about 4 form rejections, and have been trying to keep my spirits afloat, to mix metaphors. When I see the river of crap that's been published out there, I tell myself: "It's not about talent, clearly. So even if your stuff stinks, eventually you will get published." At the very least, I'll self-publish by the end of the year.

I've been trying to rid myself of my negativity by rereading my Alan Watts and Zen books. I recently finished The Way of Liberation by Watts and am now rereading Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind. This summer I'm going to take up meditation again like I was doing about 10 years ago. Can't hurt.

Bought a scale a couple of days ago. I'm weighing in at a hefty (for my frame) 182. The wife and I have struck a deal that for every 10 lbs. I shed, a reward will be forthcoming. So I've been batting some ideas around: an air pistol, a complete set of the Jeeves and Wooster DVD's, a set of cigars?...more to follow. The back will be helped by the lightened burden, I'm told, and I can definitely use the exercise.

I've got a couple of ideas for short stories I want to write this summer. When I finish them, I'll post them here. One involves Henry David Thoreau. Another one is just a title: "Man vs. Totleigh Towers"--basically, how would Bear Grylls handle among Betram Wooster's horrific relatives and acquaintances.

This afternoon, a trip out of town. More on that later.

6 days until the A-Team movie comes out.